20091228

have you ever feel this way?

korang pernah tak rase macam lonely sangat samapi tengok cite best pun takde nafsu dan perasaan. the feeling of "i never thought that I could feel this...LONELY" tak kesah la berapa ramai kawan, frenemies, scandals or bf pun yang korang ade. it still feel so lonely? ada adik beradik 27 orang pun, rumah tu penuh macam tengah buat kenduri pun korang akan rasa macam, "weyh! why i feel so EMPTY?"

if you answered YES to most of the questions above, welcome to the club bitch! i feel that sometimes. especially during the PMS thing. I know, they say PMS is created by man to make us woman, look crazy and fragile. but i am very affected by my imbalance hormones during the times. i do feel like i'm such a loser with no one to talk to, nobody to lean on to. it hurts you know. it hurts to feel alone and so far away from people eventhough you are in the same room with them.

it hurts to see others to be and look really happy like they have no problems at all. and it gets even worse when people think that i'm all happy-go-lucky-giddy-and-fun all the time. they don't know what I feel inside. they don't know what i deal with every single day of my life. they think that my life is all fun and parties. not at all. im just like you. im boring and i'm a nerd. i read law books, i play poker on FB, i like Backstreet Boys and i love the colour PINK. so, stop thinking that i have no problems in my head at all. coz, I DO.

tak kesah la apa orang fikir pasal diri ni lagi. dah penat keeping up with people's expectations. memenatkan,meletihkan,menjengkelkan. dah cukup semua lakonan, sembunyi belakang topeng. i want the world to know the real me. if they are true friends, they will love me for who i am. after all, it doesn't matter who you WERE. what matters is who you ARE. i know i'm being emosional and whatnot. blergh.

penat lah tulis panjang panjang. bye. nak menempekkan diri depan TV lagi. :D

Random fact #2 : I'm obsessed with 80's and 90's songs.blame my sisters for this

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